Wolves do not forgive or forget.
Wolves eat sandwiches hard as eff. It was Thursday night crunk in the Rock, like 70° outside, February mind you. Patio weather so me and Scotty did some work up in Hillcrest. The Fountain's glorious Kroger parking lot overlooking patio murdered some longnecks. Then we headed to Town Pump for pub fare. Upon arrival, it was crawling with Classties. Awesome. You know PBR happened too. Then it was grub time. Scotty went for the throat and ordered the Guvnah Beebe Patty Melt. It's a freaking burger on Rye. Smart shit. Then he really started using his gray matter. How about cheddar and japs on the Town Chips. Brilliant. PFunks, PBR and a Patty Melt. QBAP. GTP. BBQ. Have a great place we should visit? Let us know, offer to buy us a drink, and we can probably make it happen. You're opinion is probably wrong but leave a comment anyway.
Then I got Bucwolf all over them tamales. The chili, is, boss.
I visited the pump after the Hogs et down TX A&M. Nasty.
What is classified as Mexican? As far as I’m concerned tortilla and corn chips. You can slop anything on top and it’s Mexican. Sure a few of you pricks are scoffing at this knowledge bomb butt fucking your brain, but I’m right. Put any meat in a tortilla and it’s a burrito. Nothing more Mexican than chips and (any) dip. Am I right?
Luckily for me Town Pump does food like a boss. I like my chips red and blue. Makes me feel patriotic. I like my queso in a bowl you can eat. Ya they do that too. Loryn’s Queso is pretty damn good. I don’t count calories so I’m not too concerned about the impact this edible arrangement has on my waist.
While I might be a liar, I’m not gonna sit here and lie to you about the chicken quesadilla. It was decent but not enough to gloat about. It hit the spot but I’m probably gonna stick to town chips and tamales. In closing I’ll gossip a little. They changed their “Ouch” wing sauce. This shit is a punisher. Smoky chipotle like. I would be scared to put 12 wings down bathed in this ish.
Just when you thought shit couldn’t get any more real, they bust out the MOTHERFUCKING Sriracha. Town Chips, check. Queso, check, Japs, check. Sriracha, jizz my pants. My fear is the Sriracha bottle grows legs and walks out. Not that a bro would swipe hot sauce, but crazier shit has happened.
In case you didn’t know, Narwhals are the unicorns of the sea, and I love tacos. In many cases, I relate dollar$ and cents to tacos. Let’s be honest, 1 taco = $1. That would be for a standardized taco. Juice heads, Town Pump has mini tacos… with red shells. You could theoretically carry a few in your pocket and use them as change. Imagine buying a tube of AstroGlide for $8 and 3 mini tacos. This is pretty stupid but it makes perfect sense. Also, I love their salza. Just in case you didn’t know.
You know what else is up? Buffalo chicken strips on a sandwich with crumpled bleu cheese and some town chips. That’s what’s up’s. Brothers fuck sake, take your ass to the Pump. Play some shuffle board. Go on a Tuesday for karaoke and meet your future wife cause it’s crawling with slammies. Do all those things and tell me about it.
When two or more wolves are gathered together it is a good thing and angels get their fucking wings or something. Saturday hangover special: Mandate Town Pump style.
BBQ Bacon Cheeseburger
Town Chips, wing sauce on side
As a rule of thumb I don’t dig Doe’s Eat Place, at least the LR location. I’ve had their tamales and they’re pretty clutch, however, the restaurant is fucking gross. Enter Town Pump: one of my favorite watering holes. I blog their food too much and drink too many PBR’s at this place. Last night tamales happened. Beef Tamales and Chili with big honking kidney beans. I fully endorse this appetizer.
Xoxo LR. Jk fuck.
Days like these call for drastic actions. The South is ravaged by natural disaster and I was ravaged by a stupid fucking hangover. Kickball was canceled and I had nothing to do. Town Pump was my beacon.
12 Ouch Hot Wings
1 Pitcher of White Russians